Please Abolish Traffic Cops

The worst workers on the planet are traffic cops.

This morning I drove my daughter to school.  I was rushing.  Why? Because I’m getting married today, that’s why.  It took me an hour to get to and from her school, and we sat in bumper to bumper traffic for almost the entire time. Why? Isn’t it obvious?

Traffic cops.

Whenever there is horrible traffic, if there isn’t an accident at the head of it there are:

Traffic cops!

Traffic cops are not talented.

Traffic cops have no real authority.

Traffic cops make a huge mess out of traffic.  They create it, rather than avoiding it.

Who ever thought up traffic cops? If we have traffic lights, why override them with poorly educated, frustrated, low paid workers.  They have to wear hideous outfits, especially when it is raining, and this makes them even meaner and crankier than they are when the weather is nice.

Traffic cops hold a grudge.  If you try to ask them (nicely) to let you make a turn because you live half a block up the street, they will scream, “NO!!!”.  If they could, they would ticket you and handcuff you just for asking.  But they can’t.  Why not?

Because they are traffic cops.

I hate traffic cops.  I really do.  They are the lowest kind of cop there is, even beneath the Rent a Cops who mark your tires with chalk in the Hamptons, hoping to slap you with a big old parking ticket.  At least they can give tickets (I think).  Traffic cops can’t give anything, other than a lot of traffic and a big attitude.

I’m done now.




About mallorylayne

midlife mom seeking meaning for the rest of her life.
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